the funniest story in a long while, this is a bricklayer's accident
report, which was printed in the newsletter of the American Insurance
is a true story.
this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.
Sir: "I am writing in response to your request for additional
information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor
planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller
explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
was alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my
work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later,
were found to be slightly more than 500 lbs. Rather than carry the
bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a
pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth
the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out
and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope,
holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs.
to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my
presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I
proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now
proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explains the
fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collarbone, as listed in
section 3 of the accident report form.
down slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the
fingers on my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able
to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great
deal of pain.
approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the
ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel.
devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately
refer you again to my weight.
you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building.
In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This
accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
lacerations of my legs and lower body.
my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed
to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of
bricks and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked.
am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in
pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and
let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel beginning
its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your questions.