Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?      
Customer: A  white one...

Customer: Hi,  this is Celine .. I can't get my diskette out. 
Tech support: Have you tried pushing  the Button? 
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck. 
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note. 
Customer: No , wait a minute. I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk...sorry…

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. 
Customer: Your left or my left?

Tech support: Good  day. How may I help you? 
Male customer: Hello... I can't print. 
Tech support: Would you click on 'start'  for me and.... 
Male customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me!  I'm not Bill Gates. 

Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find  printer'.
I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor,  but the computer   still says he can't find it.  

Customer: I have  problems printing in red.. 
Tech support: Do you have a color printer? 
Customer: Aaaah..... .... ...thank you. 

Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am? 
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11. 

Customer: My keyboard  is not working anymore. 
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? 
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. 
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. 
Customer: OK 
Tech support: Did the  keyboard come with you? 
Customer: Yes.
Tech support: That means the keyboard  is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? 
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah. That one does work. 

Tech support: Your password is the small letter 'a' as in  apple,

a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. 

Customer: Is that 7 in capital  letters? 

Customer: I can't get on the  Internet. 
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password? 
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my  colleague do it. 
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was? 
Customer: Five dots. 

Tech support: What  anti-virus program do you use? 
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program. 
Customer: Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer.

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has
placed a screen saver on my computer, but
every time I  move the mouse, it disappears. 

Tech support: How may I help you? 
Customer: I'm writing my first  email. 
Tech support: OK,  and what seems to be the problem? 
Customer: Well, I have  the letter 'a' in the address,
but how do I get the little circle around it?

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer .

Tech support: Are you running it under Windows? 
Customer: No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point.
The man sitting in cubicle next to me is under a window,
and his  printer is working fine.'